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But man, Theoden is *hot*. As is Karl Urban. And Mirando Otto. And Guy I Don't Know Who Played Theodred.

ETA: I had forgotten *how much* I like Orlando Bloom. I still hate me some Will Turner and lord knows, he couldn't carry Kingdom of Heaven *or* Elizabethtown, but he is awesome as Legolas. Not, you know, brilliant, but let's face it: Legolas is not the sharpest knife in the elven cutlery drawer. Clueless! Bombastic! OTT! Totally in love with Gimli!
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I still think that "Blaze of Glory" was an inspired musical choice for vidding LotR. It's not such a great vid, but I am absurdly pleased with the song choice.
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I own all three theatrical versions. I own all three extended editions (with the statues and such that came with them). I own all three special editions of the cds. I own the movie cover versions of all the books. I HAVE GIVEN YOU ENOUGH OF MY GODDAMN MONEY. And the only reason I did both versions of the movies is because you didn't duplicate material.

And now, *now* you are releasing *yet another* version of the movies with new supplemental material? Not on, PJ. Not on at all. That is almost George Lucas levels of dickery.

No love,

P.S. James Purefoy is remarkably pretty in this movie and he is not usually someone I find attractive.

P.P.S. Oh god, I think I am 'shipping George and Princess Luna.
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if I could think of another wackily appropriate song, I would *totally* vid the Rohirrim again. 'Cause they *rock*.

Why yes, I have been watching the Good Parts Version of TTT/RotK. Frodo and his pain? Eh. Aragorn and *his* pain? Eh. Legolas/Gimli and the Rohirrim? MADE OF AWESOME. And every time I watch the Pelennor Fields sequence, I laugh and laugh and laugh, because Legolas goes to all this effort to kill one of the oliphaunts and Eomer (MADE OF WIN!) totally takes out like, three with one well-thrown spear. I love them so much!

Truly, the only pain I can stand in LotR is Boromir's (me + boromir = HEART. Even when you're being a shortsighted impulsive dick. I love you, man!) and Theoden's (KINGLY BOYFRIEND REPRESENT!). I don't even really have time for Eowyn's pain, though I *totally* have time for Eowyn KICKING ASS. And I can sort go with Rohirric melancholy, 'cause whatever, it is melancholy that involves kicking ass!

Legolas and Gimli are made of win because there is no pain there. It is just shallow, shallow, happy joy and ass kicking and banter. See? I am totally easy. All I really need to make me happy is banter and people beating the crap out of bad guys.
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you know, I totally need an icon of my Kingly Boyfriend.

Oh, Theoden, how is it that you are so awesome?
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I've been trying to vid LotR as something of a break from dealing with Cylons and Presidents and Metaphors, oh my, but *man*, I can't do it. I cannot, in good conscience, vid the Sons of Gondor to "Overcome."

It's actually too much melodrama. It's whingy and overwrought and wanky like burning (in a way that isn't also hellaciously funny). It's actually more self-indulgent than the Norrington "Hallelujah" vid (which, don't get me wrong, I love a lot because it's my baby and it accomplished everything I wanted to accomplish and it's Norrington and Rufus Wainwright *and* I got to make myself giggle with the incestuous nature of the song choice) and I am so, so ashamed.

The Rohirrim? Easy. They rock hard and they rock long and they ROCK THE FUCK ON! They're here to chew bubblegum and kick some ass and darlings, they are all out of bubblegum. Rock songs. With like, crazy mad guitar solos on the edges of dramatic cliffs with swooping crane shots and suchlike and yeah, sure, whatever, they have that Anglo-Saxon wacky melancholy note under the ROCKING THE FUCK ON but mostly there is rocking. And kicking ass.

Why yes, I have in fact been listening to Bon Jovi and GNR and CCR and it makes me sad that I can't associate Gondor with rocking quite that hard.

Oh, now I feel the need to watch all the Rohan bits of TTT and RotK.

ETA: I provisionally retract what I have said. I think Alice in Chains might work for Boromir! Woo!
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Dear Sons of Gondor,

God, with the *drama*, boys. Seriously. WTF?

Your melodrama + song melodrama = TOO MUCH FOR ME.

No love,


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April 2010

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