fic: pretty in ink (fob/mcr)

It's...4000+ words of chatfic cracktacularity. There is a distinct excess of cussing and a distinct lack of consistent POV. But what the hell, I think it's kind of funny.

( in which Patrick does not get a tattoo or have an orgy with My Chemical Romance, Andy questions his sexuality, Joe is down with the Dude Exception, and Pete is a complete ass. Also in which Gerard is kind of evil, Mikey overshares, Bob is scary about his drum kit, Frankie giggles a lot, and Ray is a sex god. And I make fun of Brendon and Ryan's tattoos. )

does that make me crazy?

Hm. So, it's been a day.

I posted fic for the first time in a long, long while, which is entirely the fault of ladysorka and annavtree; I finally text messaged the Boy I Am Very Definitely Not Dating (er. pretty much the text said "I'm sorry. I'm a total asshole and I freaked out." Then he texted me back and uh, I hid again. Hi, I am VERY mature); I have had freakish insomnia the past couple days; I had a job interview; my sister forwarded my resume to people who actually pay a living wage as opposed to a "well, at least I won't die" wage; and there's a boy sitting across the table from me who has sleeve tattoos and a lip ring and I cannot help ogling him shamelessly even though he is not hot at all.

I have discovered that the problem with the vampire hunting shenanigans story is essentially that Patrick is really woeful instead of spastically pissy. So I need to get him from spastically pissy to emo without wanting to poke my own eyes out in horror. Um. Everyone else is also very woeful. I'm ashamed of myself. Shame, shame, shame. But I suppose that is a thing that happens when vampires are involved.

MCR is like Heroes. In that way where I like them all unreservedly and want to smoosh their cheeks and generally make high pitched noises while flailing in their general direction. Also, they save lives. So, you see, MCR is *totally* like Heroes. Only they are rock stars and not so much mutants.

...OR ARE THEY?

(oh HEY not-hot sleeve tattoos plus lip ring dude is back. AWESOME. He keeps tonguing it. I am hypnotized!)

I have to say, there is not a single member of MCR who isn't covered by my Dude Exception except for Gerard. And Gerard is not covered by it because Gerard is my secret gay best friend. I don't want to hit it with him, I just want to cuddle and watch horror movies and have him do my eye makeup and then Gerard, Amy, annavtree, and I can go to Comic Con together and hang out at the gays in comics mixer. Yes, I have in fact constructed an elaborate fantasy of Things I Would Do If Gerard Way Was My Gay Best Friend.

(now there are all these lanky tattooed and pierced boys hugging. It's like crack!)

I did not actually expect this to turn into Why I Love MCR Like Whoa again. One day I will write about something else.

And I kind of feel like I am getting my fannish groove back. It's not all the way back, but you know. I'm just gonna follow my fannish bliss and write what pops into my head. It really is just too bad for you that I was using GAIM and not Trillian when I told ladysorka the story about how Gerard sometimes calls up Bob and Ray and makes them move heavy things so he can watch them lift stuff, 'cause seriously, have you seen the shoulders and arms on those boys? So he calls them up regularly and has them move his couch and Frankie tells Bob and Ray that they should give Gerard a good show and Ray sort of laughs and is all, "What, like pour a bottle of water on my head?" and Frankie's all, "Yes! And you can do that hair tossing thing!" and Bob adds in, "And give him sultry looks!" And then Frankie and Ray are all o_O at Bob and he says, "You know, a look like you want him to throw you down on the floor and have his wicked way with you, watchers be damned." And then they go all o_O at him again and Bob kind of trails off and says, "Um." And then Frankie decides that CLEARLY he should hook Bob and Gerard up, because secretly he is a tattooed, pierced, punked out Cupid. I think I have essentially cast Gerard Way as Addison Montgomery in my head.

Yeah, I dunno. I apparently just want to write a lot of geeky romantic comedies starring various permutations of FOB and MCR. Or depressing dystopias/vaguely post-apocalyptic scenarios. There doesn't really seem to be a middle ground there for me other than Extreme Crack WTF.

Depressing: Gerard sees dead people and everyone is really emo! Persecuted mutants noes!

Geeky romantic comedy: Patrick does not show Butch Walker a good time backstage at the Key Club but Pete is jealous anyway!

Cracktacular: MCR/FOB genderswap steampunk boarding school AU!