there are only three words that really convey my feelings about certain situations that seem to be happening with distressing frequency of late in Fandom At Large. I present those words to you all today.
I know that it's hard, darling, but ignoring them really is the only way to deal with them. Just...ask people to stop sending you the links. It's not perfect, but I can't think of anything else that will keep you okay and I want for you to be okay.
I'll be okay. I do have to make sure that G. never finds out about this latest round, or she might go Inigo Montoya on everyone's ass. :/ (That came out wrong. Sorry, am raw and not expressing things properly.)
Well, the most recent round was some disagreement as to whether or not "I don't find Asian people attractive" and then "I just don't find people with darker skin to be attractive" (*headdesk*) was just a little bit racist.
This is why you sit, oblivious, in your own little corner and go, "Oh pretty incest, how I love you when you are romanticized, and have nothing at all to do with reality!"
Heh. I was waiting on a bus stop in Brooklyn once when this admittedly beautiful 16ish african-american girl with serious curves and a Ronan-like collection of waist-length dreads, stared me up and down and commented to a minion, "Damn, white people can just be so....UGLY!". All while maintaining eye contact with me. I had just worked all day after going in with a mild hangover thanks to a concert the night before. I was so tired and felt every inch of how horrible looking she thought I was. But she was such a *child* and so obviously trying her bitty best to start shit, I just rolled my eyes and ignored her and she wandered off looking mildly disappointed. I wondered for a while why she wanted to start a fight with me of all people, a pale pudgy redhead who looks as threatening as a stuffed bunny rabbit. In retrospect- she wasn't. I think she may have wanted me to start crying. Bitch or not, at least I think she knew what she was doing! No matter what color you are, all this is just the same shit, different day, and that shit is just drama queen posturing. I just don't get it.
Any sort of color-based slur is just ugliness, but the big frustration for me in the whole mess is that the people claiming "I just don't find Asians to be hot" are being *disingenuous* and not understanding why, say, an Asian person (and okay, WHAT GROUP OF ASIANS? are we talking Chinese? Japanese? Korean? Indian? Pacific Islander? Middle Eastern? etc) would find that offensive. It is the same shit on a different day, but the same shit gets infuriating after a while.
I don't know. I'm just...I'm tired of people acting like if we just ignore the problem, it will go away. It won't. And I'm tired of people saying that we shouldn't call people racist for making racist remarks because of whatever reason.
And you know, I posted "Damn, white people" with the full knowledge that I was being *unfair* to quite a few very nice white people. But then I go, "Well...that's how it feels FOR ME right this second." It's unfair. I know it's unfair. And that's the entire point.
Damn, white people. I'm right there with you, especially after reading the comments and figuring out what happened. The phrase "I'm just not attracted to people with darker skin/asians/jewish people etc." is such a racist bullshit phrase. Then they try and cover up the racism by saying "It's just like saying I'm not attracted to redheads/short people etc. It's just a preference." No it's not what it is is a fucked up racist attitude, where was the holocaust of short people where were the lynchings of redheads huh? Whether you realize it or not (and you should fucking realize it) it's a racist fucking attitude that's been informed by the racist attitude of society at large. Deal with that shit and realize that if you say something like that any people of color or people with sense that hear it are going to label you racist. Own that shit. Also I don't wanna start shit in your journal otherwise you know there's some shit I would have said in response to one of the comments.
My mind, she boggles at the whole situation. And there are just so many more issues -- some grudge wank, some FANDOM IS THE HAPPY PLACE HOW DARE YOU BRING IN YOUR REAL LIFE ISSUES stuff and some...I don't even know what to call it. The continuing and willful ignorance of people.
Some people don't understand why saying "I don't find Asian people hot" might be construed as racist. Or the even better follow up of, "I just don't find people with darker skin than mine to be attractive."
I can see how that could be insulting, absolutely. Then again, about 90% of the guys I find myself attracted to are caucasian. Not because I'm racist, it's just the way it happens. Also, I tend to find middle eastern girls very attractive. Again, not sure why.
*petting* I'm totally being offensive with that statement, but lord. How is "I'm just not attracted to people with dark skin and/or *insert minority here*" not a racist statement? And how am I not supposed to say, "Wow, that sounds racist to me." or any number of things 'cause *god forbid* we should call fellow fans on their BS.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 12:51 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 02:44 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:09 pm (UTC)I swear to god, Gloss, fandom has become less welcoming and more willing to embrace its thoughtlessness the longer I've been in it.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:16 pm (UTC)Thank you. It means the world, coming from you.
I don't know what's wrong with (people in) fandom, but the stupid and the bullshit are at near-drowning proportions.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:17 pm (UTC)But that would entail feeding the crazy and I won't do it.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:18 pm (UTC)AND YET.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:23 pm (UTC)I know that it's hard, darling, but ignoring them really is the only way to deal with them. Just...ask people to stop sending you the links. It's not perfect, but I can't think of anything else that will keep you okay and I want for you to be okay.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:25 pm (UTC)Done, and done.
I'll be okay.
I do have to make sure that G. never finds out about this latest round, or she might go Inigo Montoya on everyone's ass.:/ (That came out wrong. Sorry, am raw and not expressing things properly.)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 02:31 pm (UTC)Though at moments like these I tend to cling to my great grandparents but no, raised as white as they come no matter who snuck in the family tree.
What did we do now?
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:12 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 03:31 am (UTC)This is why you sit, oblivious, in your own little corner and go, "Oh pretty incest, how I love you when you are romanticized, and have nothing at all to do with reality!"
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:12 pm (UTC)*mwah*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 04:44 pm (UTC)I had just worked all day after going in with a mild hangover thanks to a concert the night before. I was so tired and felt every inch of how horrible looking she thought I was. But she was such a *child* and so obviously trying her bitty best to start shit, I just rolled my eyes and ignored her and she wandered off looking mildly disappointed. I wondered for a while why she wanted to start a fight with me of all people, a pale pudgy redhead who looks as threatening as a stuffed bunny rabbit. In retrospect- she wasn't. I think she may have wanted me to start crying. Bitch or not, at least I think she knew what she was doing!
No matter what color you are, all this is just the same shit, different day, and that shit is just drama queen posturing. I just don't get it.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 07:47 am (UTC)I don't know. I'm just...I'm tired of people acting like if we just ignore the problem, it will go away. It won't. And I'm tired of people saying that we shouldn't call people racist for making racist remarks because of whatever reason.
And you know, I posted "Damn, white people" with the full knowledge that I was being *unfair* to quite a few very nice white people. But then I go, "Well...that's how it feels FOR ME right this second." It's unfair. I know it's unfair. And that's the entire point.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-21 05:12 pm (UTC)I'm right there with you, especially after reading the comments and figuring out what happened.
The phrase "I'm just not attracted to people with darker skin/asians/jewish people etc." is such a racist bullshit phrase. Then they try and cover up the racism by saying "It's just like saying I'm not attracted to redheads/short people etc. It's just a preference."
No it's not what it is is a fucked up racist attitude, where was the holocaust of short people where were the lynchings of redheads huh?
Whether you realize it or not (and you should fucking realize it) it's a racist fucking attitude that's been informed by the racist attitude of society at large. Deal with that shit and realize that if you say something like that any people of color or people with sense that hear it are going to label you racist. Own that shit.
Also I don't wanna start shit in your journal otherwise you know there's some shit I would have said in response to one of the comments.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 07:37 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 04:41 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 07:33 am (UTC)Other people were horribly offensive and then disingenuous about it.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-23 02:49 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-23 05:36 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-24 03:24 am (UTC)Sorry people are being horrible.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 06:44 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-22 07:32 am (UTC)